Carpe Morning

Beginnings are special.

When was the last time you put on a party hat, blew a noisemaker and raised a glass to usher in January 6th?

Has any kid ever wanted to put off the excitement of Bar/Bat Mitzvah celebrations until 5 months after the big day?

Just landed the job of a lifetime? Would you wait to get a new suit and fresh haircut for your 3rd day at work?

Probably not. Why? Because there is something significant about marking the start of something new. It’s an opportunity to take stock of the past and make plans for something better in the future.

Each morning brings us the opportunity to check in, reflect and reboot. In those first few quiet moments, as we move from dreamland into the light of a new day, we should be mindful of the gift we receive every 24 hours. For thousands of years Jewish tradition has held that we start each day with:

Modeh ani lifanecha melech chai v'kayam shehechezarta bi nishmahti b'chemlah, rabah emunatecha.

I offer thanks before you, living and eternal King, for You have mercifully restored my soul within me; Your faithfulness is great.

For the last decade or so, however, society at large has presented us with a very different morning ritual: beeps, rings, tweets, texts, pokes and on and on and on. Technology has given us a plethora of amazing freedoms, but it also has the potential to take from us, as well.



In this week’s parsha Moses directs B’nei Israel to, among other things, separate a portion of the first fruit harvested in the Land of Israel and bring it to the Kohanim in the Temple. Why not the second 1/3 or the last 1/4? Because the first of anything–the day, year, the harvest– has a special and auspicious quality, and should be used for a higher purpose.

Every morning you have the chance to use the first portion of your day for a higher purpose. Sure, someone out there has sent you a Facebook friend request, and tweets and texts have piled up overnight, but you don’t have to let these rob you of the beauty of a few minutes of physical, mental, spiritual and emotional quiet to start your day.

Make the most of your morning,

Rabbi Shmulik Yeshayahu

Upcoming featured events (click for more info):

Rosh Hashanah Dinner
Rosh Hashanah Service
Tashlich
Meal Before the Fast
Yom Kippur Service

I AM OUTTA HERE!!!

We’ve all been there.

You’re just trying to do your job, but SOMEONE–boss, coworkers, customers (take your pick!)–just will NOT. LAY. OFF. Despite your best attempts SOMEONE just keeps pushing and this time it’s just one push too far.

Freeze.

It’s what happens next that really counts. Do you

a) ignore it
b) take it in stride and laugh it off
c) go to your superior
d) flip out, swear over the intercom, grab a couple of beers and exit via emergency slide?

In the heat of the moment, flight attendant Steven Slater decided to go with what was probably the most dramatic and extreme response possible.



Judging by his meteoric rise to pop culture fame, it’s pretty clear that most people have been in similar situations and felt similar rage on the job. The fact that Slater is being dubbed “The Working Man’s Hero” attests to the degree to which his episode of workplace frustration struck a chord with just about everyone.

The problem is this: There is nothing heroic about losing it and striking out at those around you. They say that discretion is the better part of valour. King Solomon put it this way:

"It is a wise man's good sense to be slow to anger, and his glory to pass over a transgression." Proverbs (19:11)

Let’s look at another translation, shall we?

“A person of great understanding is patient, but a short temper is the height of stupidity.”

Kinda puts it all in perspective, doesn’t it?

The Rambam brings forth the wisdom of the early Sages when he points out that “Whoever angers is as if he has performed idolatry.” Pretty harsh words. But the truth often is. Think about what he’s saying here: Angry people no longer have control over themselves. They are slaves to the emotion.

So, even though we can empathize with Steven Slater, let’s not glorify his spectacular behaviour. Into every life a little rain must fall. Unfortunately, sometimes it comes down in buckets. And when it does, take a moment and think before you act.

Let a cooler head prevail,

Rabbi Shmulik Yeshayahu

Upcoming featured events (click for more info):

Rosh Hashanah Dinner
Rosh Hashanah Service
Tashlich
Meal Before the Fast
Yom Kippur Service

What Would Naomi Campbell Do?

Charles Taylor, former President of Liberia, has been on trial for war crimes in the Hague for the last couple of years and, by and large, the general public has shown little interest. Until now.

(Enter supermodel.)



Naomi Campbell has, for some time, refused to become involved with the trial. Frankly, not that surprising. Would you be excited to testify in open court against a man accused of slaughtering thousands? Probably not. Well, Naomi's luck finally ran out and she was forced to take the stand last week. She maintains that in 1997, mysterious visitors knocked on her door and gave her a bag of dirty looking stones from an equally mysterious benefactor. Others claim that she knew the sender was a despotic warlord and that the stones were precious gems mined using slave labour.

So, here’s the deal: From a Jewish perspective, can such a gift possibly be kosher?

The Talmud makes it clear that the recipient of a gift or charity has the responsibility to make sure that what he is accepting is on the up and up. It’s not enough to just turn a blind eye and assume that the blame rests with the person who committed the original crime. And even if we are only suspicious about the source, we must err on the side of caution. Similarly, secular law dictates that it is illegal to receive property or benefit from a crime.

Parshas Shoftim talks about the responsibility of B’nei Israel to set up a system of judges, magistrates, and officers to maintain law and order:

"You shall set up judges and law enforcement officials for yourself in all your cities that the Lord, your God, is giving you, for your tribes, and they shall judge the people [with] righteous judgment."

The parsha speaks of judges both in the plural and in the singular: The plural refers to the many judges needed to keep society running smoothly and the singular refers to each individual as a personal judge of his own conduct. We are all required to judge the rightness and wrongness of situations and guard against bad influences entering our neshama. It is as though we are the city and we must set up guards to protect ourselves from any negative elements trying to invade us.

Simply doing the right thing for yourself is not good enough. Hashem requires you to stay away from even the whiff of impropriety. Ms. Campbell learned the very hard and very public way that being associated with anything immoral is just asking for trouble. Keeping away from negative influences in your life brings you one step closer to the path of righteous behaviour that Hashem laid out for the Jewish people so many years ago. It was a good idea then and clearly (just ask Naomi), it still is.

Keep your hands clean and your conscience clear,

Rabbi Shmulik Yeshayahu

Upcoming featured events (click for more info):

Rosh Hashanah Dinner
Rosh Hashanah Service
Tashlich
Meal Before the Fast
Yom Kippur Service

Someone Has to Be the Grownup

Monday, August 2, 2010: Lindsay Lohan is released from prison and reenters rehab.



The tale of Lindsay Lohan is extremely sad, with a dose of pathetic sprinkled on top. She was a cute child (actor) who started doing commercials at 3 years old. And it pretty much went downhill from there.

Lindsay didn’t stand much of a chance. Ultimately, she, like everyone else, is 100% responsible for her actions. But it is really difficult to overlook the negative influences in her life before she even got to kindergarten. Never mind whether it’s generally a good idea to have a young child doing more than a 100 jobs before her teens, let’s think about the motivation behind it all.

From a Jewish perspective, children are a gift from G-d and parents are charged with doing everything they can to nurture and guide them toward a happy and healthy life of their own. Once you become a parent, it’s no longer all about you. Perhaps no one ever mentioned this to Mr. and Mrs. Lohan.

There is a very famous Bible story in which two women are fighting over the custody and identity of a baby. Each mother insists that the child is her own flesh and blood. Unfortunately, DNA testing only became readily available in the 1990’s, so that wasn’t an option. How was King Solomon going to figure this one out? He decided to let the women know that the fairest way around the problem was to give 1/2 of the baby to each of them. One of the women thought that sounded fabulous. The other begged the king not to harm the child and to simply hand it over to the other woman. Rather than getting her “fair share,” she put the welfare of the child before her own happiness.

The commentators ask the following question: Was Solomon planning to literally cut the child in two? Not likely, they say. It sounds more like a shared custody situation; the child shuttled back and forth between two “mothers,” with two identities, and two very different lives. Better than being sliced in half, but detrimental, nonetheless.

The Rabbeim teach very clearly that, among other things, parents are to give children a clear message of values that they can use to direct their path throughout life. Chasing fame, fortune, money and glamour at the expense of–and on the very backs of–our children couldn’t be further away from that ideal.

Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis is an icon of style and glamour, but she also clearly understood her role as mother, as well. She once said one of the wisest things to come out of a Kennedy:

“If you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do well matters very much. “

Instead of just wallowing in the tasty, gossipy nature of the Lindsay Lohan story, what can we take away from it?

First of all, let’s wish Lindsay well. At 24, she has, G-d willing, a long life ahead of her and the chance to make something wonderful of her privilege and opportunities. Also, let’s see it as a cautionary tale and the springboard for a great mitzvah. When you look at your children, see the opportunities for greatness: Just make sure that you define greatness as more than just money, power or fame. Deeper values make for healthy, complete human beings.

Aim higher,

Rabbi Shmulik Yeshayahu

Upcoming featured events (click for more info):

Kollel Hiking Club
Dinner for Singles
Kollel Business Club